Happy Halloween!

Having a child with autism means that you see things through a very different set of eyes.  Every parent of an autistic child knows exactly what I am referring to.  For example:  My son does not see a cardboard skeleton hanging on someone's front door as you and I would.  He sees something much more terrifying.  To him it is very real.  It is really going to reach out and grab him.  My son has a one track mind.  It can be rather difficult at times to help him "jump the track" as it were. 

Now, for a kid who's passion is dinosaurs and who loves to watch them fight and rip each others heads off, one would not think that Halloween would terrify him the way that it does.  And sadly for my son, he has a mother who adores Halloween!  Our house is covered with orange candy corn lights on the outside.  Pumpkins, gourds and beautiful amber colored mums line all the steps leading up to the front porch of our 125 year old farm house.  Cheesecloth ghosts made by my youngest daughter are hanging from the front porch waving to passers by.

And then there is the inside of our house.  Scarecrows everywhere!  Halloween trees covered with years worth of Charlie Brown and the Peanuts Gang Halloween ornaments.  More pumpkins and huge yellow ware bowls filled with gourds.  Pumpkin and ghost lights hang in all of the old windows.

So, my son is not without exposure to Halloween.  If anything,  I would have expected that he would have been desensitized over the years.  Not the case.  He does however, love to play with the Charlie Brown characters.  He enjoys watching A Charlie Brown Halloween on television each year.  He even picked out a new costume this year.  Super Mario!  (an amazing feat since he has been either Sponge Bob or a caveman for the past five years!)  But the week just before Halloween his behavior starts to become worse.  He is teary.  He is moody.  He cannot look at the store displays.  He shouts "I hate Halloween!"  over and over.

Yesterday was his class party.  He made it through the entire day.  This year his teacher did not invite the parents.  That was a first!  I think that was really hard for my son.  He wanted to bring cookies to his party and went to the market and chose the cookies that he wanted to take to and share with his classmates.  And he was quite proud of this.  But by the time he came home from school, he was crabby, crying and snapping at everyone.  He was scared and angry.  He really could not function at all.  So, I popped him in a big comfy chair with a warm a fuzzy blanket and he watched Shrek's new Halloween show over and over until dinner.

This morning he woke me up before 5 telling me he was all better and he could not wait to go trick or treating!  I reminded him that it is just our friends and neighbors under all those costumes.  Just the people you know son.  The friends you see everyday!  Cardboard is just cardboard.  If it scares you, take a pair of scissors to it!  It's all fun and  just make believe! 

He goes through this every year.  He will go trick or treating.  For all of 15 or 20 minutes.  My husband will take him back home and I will continue on with his younger sister.  When we do return home sometime later, his sister will give him some of her candy.  (Make no mistake.....it will be the candy she does not like!)  But that act of partial kindness will touch his heart and we will have peace and happiness in our home.... for a few moments at any rate!

So, I wish you a wonderful, safe and a candy filled Happy Halloween!